I'm Getting Old! Understanding Our Children

I Corinthians 13:11 "When I was a child, I talked like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child. When I became a man, I put away childish ways". When I was a teenager, I made a promise to myself that I would never do what I felt the adults in my life did to me. I felt like they didn't understand what it was like to be a me( a seventeen year old). The promise that I made was that I would never forget what it was like to be a teenager. Guess what? I am now 34 years old, and I cannot, for the life of me, remember what it was like to be a teenager! I don't even remember what it was like to be single with no children. And I'm still young! Well, mostly young.

Think about what it must be like to be a young person under the age of twenty. I know you don't understand what they are going through. Or maybe you don't understand why they feel that what they are going through is so important. Think about teenage boys for a second. Teenage boys have every single desire, frustration, and insecurity that teenage girls have. They are just conditioned by the world to suck it up and be strong. So instead of allowing them to express those emotions, we adults make them internalize all of these emotions (with no outlets)until they burst out on their own. Usually this outburst of emotion is expressed in the most unhealthy way. Now don't get me wrong. I'm not telling you what to do. I'm simply asking you to consider some things the next time you talk to a young man or young woman:

1. The problems that they have are important to them. It doesn't matter if it is important to you or not. They need to feel like you are sympathetic to their problems.

2. Sometimes, you just have to let them vent. No opinions, no solutions, just be a sounding board.

3. Let them know that it's okay to feel how they feel. Lets give our young people permission to show emotion. Boys and girls need to know how to laugh, cry, challenge thinking, and change opinions.

4. The more you let them talk and you listen, the more they will let you talk and they listen.

5. Our children are fragile. They may look older than they are. But they still need to feel like it's okay to be babies.

Remember the verse in I Corinthians? Sometimes, when we put away childish things, we also put away some great qualities. My son does not yet know that he shouldn't push so hard for everything he wants until he gets it. He doesn't know that he is not supposed to be learning chess at the age of five. He doesn't know that you can't just speak to every stranger that you meet. He doesn't know that the world is not safe. Some of these things I need to teach him. But there is a part of me that wants to let him be naive a little while longer. Our children have the rest of their lives to be adults. Lets agree to let our children be children for now and provide the support they need as they come of age. They will get there sooner than we think.

Peace and Love,

Rev. Mike





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